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It was time to get my hearing checked.

Abner & Me

This has been so educational for you. My mother is clueless. And a couple of times, I was almost history too! I need a little adventure in my life. It will take five minutes. We can even have a picnic in the past! What do you think? What about Uncle Wilbur? Why would I want to travel one hundred and fifty years with her? She kept egging me on, saying I was a party pooper and that I had no spirit of adventure.

It was a total role reversal. She was trying to talk me into traveling through time, and I was giving her all the reasons why it was a bad idea. That was true. I was nearly killed on that trip when I got into a car with the Babe and found out he drove like a maniac. But I never told Mom that. First, I needed a new pack of cards.

Second, I needed a baseball so I could get it autographed for my dad. And a Sharpie marker, of course, to write on the baseball. I had Mom take the picture of Doubleday and follow me into the living room. We sat on the couch side by side. Finally she came back down and sat on the couch next to me.

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A couple of juice boxes. Some other snacks. A portable umbrella. It might be raining in ! Doubleday waiting for lunch. I picked up the photo of Abner Doubleday. It was sort of like the feeling you get when you touch a TV screen. It was a pleasant feeling. The familiar tingling got stronger, and then my whole hand was vibrating, then my wrists, and then my arms. I felt the sensation sweep across my chest to the other side of my body, then down my legs. My entire body was tingling now. I had reached the point of no return. And then we faded away. I could see it with my eyes closed. A gigantic yellow-orange ball of fire flashed over my head, brighter and louder than anything I had ever seen produced by Hollywood.

This was followed by a booming explosion that knocked me to my knees. I thought the world had ended. For maybe half a second, I looked around. Mom was still next to me. We were outside, in a cemetery. Or at least there were some tombstones scattered around haphazardly. There was a blanket of smoke hanging over the area. It was very hot out.

Clayton Kershaw opens 25-year-old baseball cards

It had to be summertime, I guessed. The blades of grass around me were pushed down in waves, like the ripples in a pond after you throw a stone in the water. Suddenly stuff was flying all over us. Clumps of mud. Sticks, grass, rocks, pieces of tree bark. It was like we were caught in the middle of a tornado. It was just flying every which way. This was no earthquake or volcano or hurricane. Somebody was shooting at us.

We each hunkered down behind a tombstone. There were more explosions, some of them in the distance and some of them just a few yards away.

Abner & me : a baseball card adventure

I could hear popping sounds too. They sounded like microwave popcorn, if you were inside the microwave oven, maybe inside the bag.

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Am I okay?! Oh yeah, bombs were exploding all around us. Stuff was flying.

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I could die any second, and Mom wanted to know if I was okay. This was like going for a walk in the park. It might rain. A bullet whizzed past my ear. I felt it as it went by. The bullet chipped off a little piece of the tombstone I was hiding behind.

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One more inch and it would have chipped off a piece of my head. I was lying on my stomach in the dirt now, trying my best to press my body flat against the ground. Mom was doing the same thing.

I could smell something in the air. Sulfur, maybe. Something burning.